Margaret Cho Chili-Figs Herself (The Hard Way)

Apparently, some people do not digest spices. I’ve heard other people talk about a bit of rectal burn after eating spicy food, but it does not happen to me; when I eat a spice, it gets digested. Apparently this is not the case for Margaret Cho, the comedian and uninhibited woman-about-town:

Ok my asshole is on fire and I know that this is only my own fault but it still hurts. I have a problem with spices, and it’s a Korean thing and I just wish my mouth would stop writing checks that my asshole cannot cash. I had salad with my friends John, Ian and Sarah last night, but they all had pizza, and so when the food came, there was the little red pepper shaker that people will use on their pizza along with parmesan cheese. I took the shaker and opened up the top and poured the chili pepper flakes onto my salad. There were a good 3-4 heaping spoonfuls of it. I am not sure how much exactly, but I am guessing by the violent hours I have spent on the toilet this morning, it was quite a lot.

I eat it and enjoy the heat but I wish someone would tell my asshole because even though I love it going down, it’s a trial coming out. My hole is like “wtf?” and these blistering hot excretions really are a high price to pay for the flavor excitement of chili.

Make a comment:

You must be logged in to post a comment.